Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Wasps!

Inspired by Illahee's blog I will vent about these little monsters today.
When I grew up, in the summer we used to eat our meals outside on our terrace in the garden. Wasps were always there. There was always a wasps' nest in the neighbourhood. We hated them swirring around our faces and then sitting on our meals. They really cut off little pieces and brought them back to their nest!
Don't they look dangerous, once you take a closer look? They can sting and bite! I've never been stung, but bitten. Ouch.

I learned as a child, how wasps work: First they send out scouts, who fly around the area to find prey (in this case human's meals) and once they found it, they try it a bit (flying close, sitting down, maybe collecting a sample), remember the place and fly back to the nest to call for reinforcement. Then they all come! The scouts obviously couldn't be allowed to return to their nest!
My family doesn't like to spray poison all over, especially, when you have to fear to also breathe it in and probably eat it with you meal. Ugh. But the wasps were intolerable. It took a lot of discipline to not wave about yourself constantly. A solution was needed.
We became very skilled in killing wasps.
Whenever they sat down, they sat down for the last time in their lifes. We captured them with glasses or slew them with the points of our knifes. The point-knife-method is very fast. (The knife is not used for cutting, but for beating.)
My father even was so fearless to give a flying wasps a smack, so the poor thing fell on the table, wondering what happened and then using the point-knife-method. I never dared that...

My mother said, she couldn't stand the constant hunting at the table and introduced a trap. A glass, half-full with sugary water. The wasps then want to drink from it, fall in and... drown. Wasps drown slowly and my father and I rose a stink about the stupid trap. We preferred the hunting and our argument convinced my mother, too: We didn't want to see the agony of those poor things for endless minutes. Didn't want to make them suffer, possibly yelping for help to their fellows in wasp-language. We just wanted to eat in peace and didn't find any sadistic pleasure in making wasps suffer unnecessarily. No more traps.

Yesterday I took a test (ugh) and presented myself a meal in a cafe as a reward. And once I had my meal, the wasps were practically everywhere. I rarely see wasps in the middle of the city, but they were there! Do you know that horrible feeling when they whirr around your head? I killed four wasps during my meal, much to the amusement of an old lady who was sitting at the next table. Whenever I had killed one again, it seemed to give her pleasure. ^^ Maybe she has been stung once. The waiter seemed to be really sad for "the poor animals", though.
The remaining wasps I had scared off after four killings and could eat in peace.

Nowadays there are no wasps in the neigbourhood of my childhood's house. Maybe the neighbours finally got the hang of it.

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