Thursday, June 27, 2013

I fear for my career

And this rhymes!
Oh the joy.

It's no news to anyone that careers are hard! Aside from this common knowledge I think everyone experiences the hardships of a career differently. One might have a choleric boss or mean colleagues or just a shit job. Though I'm guessing a real shit job means no career at all...

In my case the actual hardship is building up myself. I just finished my degree a year ago and I need aaaallll~ the input my job can give me. One day I hope to lose this gnawing feeling that I know nothing and absolutely nothing. Shit feeling, that. Makes applying for jobs extremely complicated.

Interviewer: "So, what wonderful knowledge do you have that makes you profitable for this company?"
Me: "Nothing. I know nothing."
        Awkward pause.
Me: "But I wanna learn! No, really! I'm really motivated!"
        Even more awkward pause.
Me: "Well, I got a degree..."

You see?! Shit feeling, that.

So I chose my jobs so far over their potential of teaching me great things. In my current job I was to learn how to calculate a whole project. Of course this didn't start on the first day. I had to learn more basic stuff first and fit myself into the company. I was not fussed about this at all. But after 6 months I was fussed. Heh.
Turns out the guy responsible for all the calculating here sucks donkey balls and I'd do best not learning anything from him. (How did this company survive, you ask yourself! Well, it sure didn't strive.) But my boss told me they were about to employ a fabulous guy with lotsa experience, who then would teach me. Learn from the masters and all. Yeah! Yeah. Sure.

Turns out the new guy is waaaayyy too great to teach anyone anything. Also it seems they didn't tell him about me not being his secretary and gimme-a-copy-of-that-gal. I began fearing for my career. If I keep on doing this here, I'll never climb up any ladder, anywhere.

So I went for an awkward interview. Again.
And almost cried on the way out. Man, what a bad interview! Totally did not go well.

They called yesterday. I got the job.

Life is full of wonders.


  1. Congrats :)

    Happiness is more important than money but having both is really nice ;)

    1. Thank you!

      Well, in the new job I would earn a bit less than now, but if the job itself is better, I'll be much happier. :-)

  2. Congrats on the job.
    Interviews can really be tough for some, my sister has panic moments before the interview. She recently got a promotion which I am happy about too.

    1. Thank you!

      I also was really shaky before the interview. It's no wonder these things make people nervous. You never know what they might ask and somehow it makes you forget all your own questions and that might make them think you're an idiot. -.-

      It's great about your sister!

  3. congratulations! recognizing that you have a lot to learn is good, but radiating self-confidence for the stuff you ALREADY know is also important.

    1. Thank you!
      I'm working on learning and radiating. :-)